"Inertia": The Post Also Known As Motaki's Opinions On Routine

After I read this post, which you should read, I was inspired to write this.

Change has a seriously weird way of wriggling into your life.

Let's take this from the top. When I was about seven, I had a strong disdain of hunting. I hadn't the slightest desire to deer hunt, was ambivalent about small-game hunting; I was just about as far anti-hunter as you could get. And I hated people who wore fur. With a passion. I fished, and camped, and that was about it.

Enter YEAR EIGHT. I went into third grade. My mom and I moved in with the current Guy-My-Mom-And-I-Live-With, who I had hardly known at the time. I'd never even spoken to him.

He is about as pro-hunter as they come. He has a stuffed deer over his staircase - which I go up and down daily, and I glance at that deer every time I do- and a stuffed walleye over his fireplace. He fishes with my uncle every month, at least.

By the time I was ten, I was seriously envying him for going deer hunting. I didn't know about the magical Apprentice Hunter Validation that lets you start hunting at ten when you would need a firearms-safety certificate. I went on fishing trips with him. We even went camping for the weekend of my tenth birthday, him, my mom, my dog, and me.

He humors my fantasies, inadvertently introduced me to falconry, made it possible for me to have a dog.

He changed my life, shattered my routine.

I wouldn't have it any other way.

(This post was written for Kelly Hines of Southfriedchildren. :)

Atoms: More Complicated Than They Have to Be

Why can't they just say "So the protons and neutrons hugs each other very tightly and a very tight ball, and the electrons run in circles around them like demented dogs."?

Dock Spider

Spiders are scary. We all know that.

Fucking scary. Oh yeah, easy.

The spiders 235 miles north of here that look like they were exposed to radioactive material as eggs?

Fucking. Terrifying.

And there was one in the window of the cabin Mom&Me we sleeping in when we were at psychotic-believes-i'm-inferior-"friend"'s house.

Me: "Holycrap there's a reallybig spider in the window!!!"

The thing was dead center in a really big web. Mom: [stares for a couple seconds] "Relax. It's dead. No need to worry."

The thing, after a couple of seconds, began ascending its web like a cannibal climbing a net in the Lego Pirates of the Carribean Wii game, and ducked out of sight to eat a few young children.

    
-Motaki, Spider Terrified

Update: This post was 5x as long until I drew a pic of the spider and forgot the rest of the article, and to put the pic on. So here it is.

UPDATE: Goddammit. I made a typo.

My Dream Job

I got back from this vacation today and my mom's friend up there was pestering me about which job I want my first one to be. No, that's not right. It's more "WHICH JOB DO YOU WANT YOURS TO BE BECAUSE I WAS WORKING WHEN I WAS TEN AND YOU MUST WORK TOO OR YOU WILL BECOME MORE INFERIOR." I'm already quite inferior in her mind to the girl she's known for four years tops (hello, eight years anyone) and you can't even get a job nowadays until you're 15/16.

Me: What. The. Fuck. Why is she doing this to me???

"Friend": "What do you want your first job to be?????"

Me: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME WHY THE FUCK DO I DESERVE THIS?????

"Friend": (not hearing mental shouting) "What do you want your first job to be??????????"

Me: [Stoic silence.]

But I could totally work at the Cabela's over in Rogers. Helloooo, as a cashier you get to touch the BIG $$$$$$$$ camping gear! Touch! It! Maybe even put it in bags!

~nirvana~

Omen

I have a strong interest in becoming a falconer. Or, as the proper word is for one who hunts with hawks, Austringer. I have two years until I hit Minnesota's minimum age to begin an apprenticeship, fourteen.

But you know what's weird? Two years ago, a large female redtail hawk perched on the railing just outside the downstairs window. I still remembered every detail of that bird, and we haven't seen another hawk since.

Until three weeks ago.

First, a redtail flew overhead with a mouse that was still shrieking. A week or two later, another redtail (maybe the same one) dived onto something in the (very game rich) swamp/marsh behind my home.

And today, something very, very dark colored went into the olive tree not even thirty feet from me when I was outside reading a book. It was much, much too dark to be a red-tail- it was a solid, unbroken nearly-black grey, unquestionably a raptor. I think it was a Northern Goshawk- rare in the Minnesotan metro area. I walked toward the tree and got within ten feet until I flushed it out- a smallish raptor, about twice the size of a kestrel, flew off towards some two-three hundred-yard-away trees.

Wish I had an apprentice falconer's license and another license to trap hawks, along with a nice Bal-Chatri trap and a rat for bait- could've seen what that falcon really was.

So when I get a red-tail when I turn fourteen, I'll probably make another blog to document my adventures with him/her. This blog will probably still get occasional update.

Until next time,

Motaki

Warning: I am going to attempt setting up some pages

This may epically fail. Watch out.

I'm On A High That Isn't Drug Related at 12:50 in the Morning

I am hyper. Extremely excited.

SCHOOL IS ALMOST FREAKING OVER.

and I killed FOUR subjects in online school today. Who's your mother, and what does she do? :D

But then since I don't want to finish math yet because it's confusing and I already sacrificed a fishing trip tomorrow (and the guy my mom and I live with is leaving at SIX THIRTY, he's gotta be going after something awesome) so I'll deal with stupid maths tomorrow.

And now mom wants to go to bed and I wrote 1350 words for a single chapter in this prequel I'm writing to my book and I haven't even hit the part the chapter is ABOUT!!!

I am about to be tortured slowly, by boredom. And I had to type "Boredom" five times before I gave in and let spellcheck slect "Boredom"- WHICH I TYPED AND IT REJECTED!!!

F-cking spellcheck.

And my mom is begging me to get off the computer but I was entertained by typing and read and shit... shit... shit.